Dealing with a sociopathic school bully, three high school freshmen hire a low-budget bodyguard to protect them, not realizing he is just a homeless beggar and petty thief looking for some easy cash.

Drillbit Taylor

In the hope of winning the woman of his dreams, Amanda, lovelorn meter-reader Roger Wadell enrolls in a secret confidence-building class. The course's title takes on much more meaning when he discovers that his egomaniacal professor Dr. P also wants the same woman. They begin a fierce rivalry that quickly spirals out of control, their pranks and insults get uglier as they try to prove who is the ultimate guy's guy.

School for Scoundrels

Taken aback by his mother's wedding announcement, a young man returns home in an effort to stop her from marrying his old high school gym teacher, a man who made high school hell for generations of students.

Mr. Woodcock

Bones Conway and Jack Kaufman didn't really know what they were in for when they enlisted in the U.S. Army; they just wanted to get a job and make some money. But these new recruits are so hapless, they run the risk of getting kicked out before their military careers even begin. Soon, though, they're sent to the Middle East to fight for their country -- which they manage to do in their own wacky ways.

In the Army Now

Mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper's paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can't bring the culprit to justice, a surly police detective is recruited to close the case.

Observe and Report

The owner of a factory that produces flavor extracts, Joel Reynold seems to have it all, but really doesn't. What's missing is sexual attention from his wife, Suzie. Joel hatches a convoluted plan to get Suzie to cheat on him, thereby clearing the way for Joel to have an affair with Cindy, an employee. But what Joel doesn't know is that Cindy is a sociopathic con artist, and a freak workplace accident clears the way for her to ruin Joel forever.

Extract

In Martha's Vineyard, Mass., conjoined twins Walt and Bob Tenor make the best of their handicap by being the fastest grill cooks in town. While outgoing Walt hopes to one day become a famous actor, shy Bob prefers to stay out of the spotlight. When a fading Hollywood actress, Cher, decides to get her show "Honey and the Beaze" cancelled, she hires Walt -- and his brotherly appendage -- as her costars. But their addition surprisingly achieves the opposite.

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